I Might Step On Your Toes....

Today there was a news story about a bus turning on its side in Wellsville, KS. 9 children were injured coming back from a church camp. After reading an article on MSNBC giving more information about the crash, I decided to read the comments that people could write regarding the article. I don't know why I read it (I can't even remember what made me remember that there was a comment section), but I read it anyway.

As I had predicted, before really getting into a plethora of the comments, there was a lot of discussion about God and why this happened. Some people were debating good and evil, some were debating about whether there is a God or not.

The comment that spurred the debate on good and evil stemmed from someone saying that they hoped the bus was from Westboro Baptist Church. They thought the church was in Wichita (which I felt a tinge of offense because he got the location wrong) until someone mentioned that the church was in Topeka and then laid into them about how no one should hope that children would be hurt. I don't think the original commenter meant for their quote to come off as wanting children (no matter where they are from) to be hurt, but his distaste for the things Westboro preaches. He said that they preach hate, which most people would find true.

Someone came along and said that the original commenter must not believe in God because he thinks that all churches teach hate. Well, that is not true either because clearly churches do not normally teach hate. The original commenter must have felt offended and probably just wanted to push everyone else's buttons because then a rant started about how God would not let something let that happen. This led to more people coming to the comment section and putting in their two cents about what goes on in churches, good/evil, what's real and what is not real.

This is where I might step on your toes. While reading this, I became very flustered when people stood on a soapbox when they expressed what they believed/thought. It made me a little sad that the comments had strayed away from feeling sad about what happened to these children, to being filled with their own hate from both sides. Maybe it is not so much hate, but more distaste for the other's point of view. People who did not believe in God were putting down those who did, and the people who did believe in God were saying those who did not were bad.

My take on this argument is right in the middle. If things were up to me, I would want everyone to just be quiet. I can understand both sides of the argument. No one wants to be told that they are "wrong" and everyone wants to be "right". There have been times where someone had told me something that I don't agree with, but I don't argue that I don't agree with them. Actually, that is a lie. I have had arguments with people that I have had a difference of opinion with, but I never told them they were wrong, I just told them that that is not something I would agree with.

Two weeks ago, NBC Nightly News had a report at the end of their telecast about how it was Ringo Starr's birthday. If you forgot who he is, he was the drummer of the world famous, British invasion, highly influential band, The Beatles. If you know me at all, you know that I love love love the Beatles. I was so happy to see this report because I have been very influenced by that band. I have seen their Cirque du Soleil production in Vegas TWICE, own movies based on their music, and get very excited when I hear their music. In fact, all their music was played during the dinner portion of our wedding reception.

While most of the Beatles have had controversial run-ins with the law (two being banned from two different countries), they stood for a lot of good. Two very important stances they took were on Love and Peace. They believed that love could make peace and peace could make love. I believe in both. When the nightly news was doing their story, they had a small interview with the now 70 (he does not look 70) Beatle. Ringo said that the only gift he wanted from fans that day was to say at noon "Peace and Love, Peace and Love". That is wonderful.

My version of peace and love is every accepting everyone regardless if you agree with them or not. However, there are gray areas to this thinking as well. I do not believe in agreeing with terrorists, people who hate, and racism. If someone planning on committing a crime were to tell me that they were going to commit a crime, I would try talking them out of it. If they decide that I was not convincing enough to keep them from committing the crime, then so be it. I would call the police, but that is all I could really do to help them. Anyway.

I was surprised that so many people could not just accept that someone might have a different opinion of them. We live in a world where everyone thinks they need to be right and if we don't agree with what they believe, than we are wrong. I was really sad that just because someone expressed their opinion, than they did not know God. Or if they did believe in God, they were small minded. I enjoy hearing people's opinions, and I think that all of these people had something in common without even realizing it. Both sides did not want to hear what the other had to say, and it made both sides mad. Why can't we realize that maybe we are all mad for the same reason? I have things that I believe and things I don't. There are days that I want to hear people's opinions, and days that I don't. I think we should all just state our peace, accept that someone may or may not believe it, and move on with our day. We should not continue so far into an argument to tell people that they are wrong and say mean things about them.

There are social things I believe in that some people do not agree with because of religious or personal reasons. For instance, I totally support gay marriage and people living a lifestyle different from my own. My take on peace and love helps me mold this opinion, plus I have many friends who are gay that I believe should have the same rights that I have. However, my upbringing would say that I am wrong. I grew up in a family that went to church where we were told that this is unnatural or wrong. I know that not all churches say this because now there are churches where there are homosexual preachers or churches that are with the LGBT Alliance. Regardless of what a church preaches, I still believe in gay marriage. If someone were to tell me that I was wrong and here are the reasons why, I would say "Well that is their opinion" and go about my day. If there was a ballot where you could vote on it, we obviously would not vote the same, but if they asked me why I felt so passionately about this, I would tell them. Never would I tell them that they are wrong, but I would try to maybe have them think about it in a different way. I also have views on feminist issues that are the same way. There are issues where I do not agree with my husband. We talk about them, but we never call each other names or say that each other is wrong. We have just learned to agree to disagree.

There are also the people that believe the same things I do, but they are so extreme that I have a hard time even talking to them. For instance, while writing this, Bill Mahr is on the Wanda Sykes Show doing a panel. Here is the thing about Bill Mahr, I tend to have the same thoughts he does, but he goes to an extreme where I cannot agree with him anymore. Or he makes people feel bad, which makes me feel bad for agreeing with him. He is very forward about his stance on religion and thinks that people are crazy for believing in a god. While I can respect him for having an opinion, he needs to be a little bit lighter about the way he presents it. He made a movie called Religiouless where he tried to show the crazy side of religion. I know tons of people who did not want to see this movie because he was so rude. He has the right to make a movie how he wants to make it, but he crosses the line when he goes to extreme measures to show people in a bad light or to make a point. I have seen clips of the movie in classes that I have taken, and that is enough for me.

I also believe in the legalization of weed. Personally I don't do it, never have and never will, but that does not mean that I do not see the good in legalizing this drug. You can stop reading here if you don't want to read my reasons (you are partaking in peace and love). Weed is not as deadly as drinking. I have not read anywhere yet where someone had died from inhaling too much weed. You can die from drinking too much without even getting on the road. Also, weed does not make people loud and obnoxious. It actually mellows people out. I know people who are very close to me that you can tell that they are much calmer after smoking. I would rather they are calm than full of stress and anxiety. People say that weed is bad because when you do it, you are so mellow that you cannot do anything else in the day. Well drinking too much has the same effect. When you drink, you cannot drive a car or perform a job to the best of you ability. When you smoke, you have to make the same responsible choice on whether it will keep you from doing something you really need to do. One of my friends suggested that we go out tonight but I said I couldn't because I had to get up early the next morning. I would have to make that same decision if I ever decided to smoke weed (which I would not). Also, the money going to try and catch people selling/doing weed could be spent elsewhere (like on education) if we stopped draining it into the ridiculous fight against the drug. Plus, jails would not be over crowded because we would have less people in them for something so small like possession. There is also the argument that there would still be crimes with people wanting drugs. My take is that the crime would be like any other crime: someone has something you want. Well, people rob banks for the same reason. A bank has money you want but don't have while a dealer has a drug you want but don't have. There should be punishment if you break into someone's home to steal their weed, but having it should not be a crime. Finally, there is the argument that weed is the gateway drug. That is not entirely true. Everyone I know who has done drugs have not necessarily wanted to try harder drugs. They smoke because they want to relax. There are some people who do harder drugs, but most of the time it is because they are adventurous and need something more exciting in their lives. My idea of being more adventurous would be to run a full mile. In conclusion, that is my opinion on weed.

This post started out talking about how we should just accept each others opinions and fight for love and peace, but it has ended with me selling my opinion to you. I believe that my opinions are all about having love for others and trying to make things easier and more peaceful for everyone. Take away from this what you want, but most of all I want you to have peace and love for each other.

Until next time....

Moving Has Aged Me.

Apparently I am terrible at keeping a blog, and probably not make this a career if I were looking to make money, because it looks like I would never show up for work!

The topic of today's blog is MOVING!!! (Pee-Wee Herman sound effects should be going in the background at this time).

Bryan and I just moved to Overland Park via Manhattan. I thought we were young, sprite youngin's but it turns out, you find out what 60 years old is going to feel like when you are 25 when you move.

We moved on Overland Park because Bryan is getting his doctorate at UMKC this fall and it just makes sense to move closer to school instead of making a 2.5 hour drive one-way, everyday. In past blogs, I have let you in on how hard and annoying it is to look for a job and a place to live. Well, I found a job and we found a condo to live in. The new job is just like my old job, just more high-tech. And our new place is like our old place in that it is rented.

Our new condo made us very happy because it was bigger, close to work, and in a nice part of town. After signing the lease, paying a deposit and first months rent (ouch! on the pocketbook), we were ready to start packing. Now, if you have ever moved, packing is not really the hard part. The only real downfall to packing is working up the motivation to actually wake up from your nap and start packing. We waited until the last week before moving to really start considering it. Sure we would sit around and think "Maybe my Jedi-mind tricks will finally work and I can mentally move that book into that box." That does not work quite so well. Saturday was the big day to move. So when Friday rolled around and we only had three boxes of books packed, we decided that maybe we should hunker down and really get to business. Nine hours later, our apartment had bare walls, but our floors were cluttered with boxes and boxes of "stuff".

Everyone knows how stressful moving is. We woke up thinking we needed to make the best of the situation and did...until one of our family members showed up an hour early, which was before we even got out of bed! Don't get me wrong. I was super excited for their early arrival because I figured that meant they held the excitement for moving that I was lacking. I figured that if someone else was excited, that might rub off on me and things would be better than expected.

That feeling lasted for about 45 minutes. Bryan and his father went to get the moving van while I got dressed and called my parents to see when they would be arriving. I had given them a time-frame to be at our place between 9 and 10. I knew that they would be later because lets face it, if your parents are okay being a little late to your wedding, they won't mind showing up even later to help move you. So I call my parents who live in Wichita at 8:45 and say "Hey, where are you?" My mom, smiling on the other end of the phone line says "We are sitting at McDonald's on 47th and Broadway." My jaw drops and I am sure my face turned red. "What?!" You see, 47th and Broadway is a mile from their house. They are supposed to be there no later than an hour and 15 minutes from that moment, and they still have to START a 2.5 hour drive to Manhattan. I was enraged. My mom laughs (because clearly this is hilarious) and says "Well you didn't sound like you were too serious about us being there at 10 so we were going to take our time." Meanwhile, my dad is in the background assuring me that they will be there in an hour and a half. Um, I don't know when my dad acquired super-human speed.

While I am fuming that my parents are late, Bryan and his dad start packing the heavy stuff. SIDENOTE: Last year when Bryan and I were moving into our apartment before our wedding, my dad decided to have a tent sale at his business that same weekend.

God Bless, Gary Pinkall. When I told him my parents were going to be late, he said it was fine and that he read a statistic that the two most stressful things a couple goes through is starting a new job and moving. Check and Check. So they start moving couches and beds while I load my car up. My parents show up at 10:30 (wow, my dad does have super-human speed or the cops did not want to try and chase him down), but I was still not in a good mood. I decided that that would be a good time for me to take a chair to my aunt's house that my cousin was going to pick up. That was a good move because that gave me time to cool down. Also, thanks to my Auntie Pam for talking me down as well.

Soon we were on the road to Overland Park. My dad and I lead the caravan of cars/moving van/motorcycle up to KC. Actually, I should say that my dad and I broke away from the pack. Did you know that moving cans are really slow? This lead to another level of stress because my dad was on his motorcycle behind me and I have never been so fearful of a motorcycle and until he was behind me. He let me lead since I had the GPS, which meant that when I changed lanes, I really had to look behind me instead of leading on faith that no one was in the other lane. If he was not behind me, I made sure to check and see if he was on the side of the road.

After the GPS told me to exit on closed Interstate exits, I decided to turn it off and find my way to our new place. I had only been their once, so I used my keen instincts and sense of direction to find our place. When we finally got to the condo (after everyone else who had been trailing about 10 miles behind us the entire time!), my dad says "Gee Dusti. You were speeding. You are a crazy driver." Wait...didn't you tell me earlier in the day that you would be able to knock and hour off of an normally 2.5 hour drive? And I'm speeding?

The unloading began. This time, my dad partook in the unloading of the heavy stuff. He moved couches and beds and bookshelves with the rest of the guys while I put my mom to work cleaning and I moved not so light boxes. My poor dad. He was sweating and huffing and puffing before anyone else, and he had only been moving our stuff for about fifteen minutes. Bryan and Gary had been at this for twice that long and looked like they could run a marathon after we got settled in.

When the boxes were moved in, we decided to take the truck back, eat some dinner, and those of us not staying the night (everyone by my mom and me) would go home. Before we went to dinner though, we kind of did a once over on the place. This condo was less than spectacular. When we did the initial walk-through after signing the papers, we noticed that some food had been left in the pantry, a bike was still on one of he balconies, and cans of paint were in different closets. Also, and by far the best part, was that our gas had not been turned on. This was our fault. The entire time we were switching services over, we forgot that some things were run by gas. So we tried lighting the pilot light. That did not work. So I call the landlords who happen to be our age and happen to be first time landlords (I am assuming). I ask about the pilot light and wonder if they have had any trouble with it. They said that the place had not been rented for a little while and it probably went out. They said we needed to call Kansas Gas Service. So Bryan calls and it turns out that they cannot come out until Monday. Cold showers anyone? This was Saturday so we cannot do anything with hot water like laundry, dishes, and most importantly, showers. With frustration setting in, we decide to go take the truck back and get dinner.

Finding businesses in a new town is tough. Sure we could have used our GPS, but it died after I used it because my cigarette lighter outlet does not work so it cannot charge while I drive. Does anyone remember what a phone book is? There happened to be one on our front porch, so we utilized this antique to find a Uhaul return place. The bad part about phone books is that they might come out every year, but address are not updated every year. So when we thought we found the closest depot, it turns out to be wrong. We pulled into a really nice neighborhood, contemplated leaving it in front of someone's house before deciding that maybe it would be okay to try one more number before giving up hope. We finally find a place, drop off the truck, eat, and my mom and I go back to the condo to clean.

Shout out to my mom for being a great cleaning lady. She knew all the ins and outs of getting built on grease off of ovens and how to not be afraid to stick your hands places you would not normally touch without bleach handy. Hearing "Oh My God" and "What Is This" randomly was quite fun. What was not fun, was finding out how much crap was left by the last tenants and was not cleaned out by our landlord. We found out that one toilet releases water in the tank and fills itself up without any manual help like flushing the toilet, the other toilet you have to hold the handle down until all the water is out of the bowl for it to fully flush, the Hot knob on the downstairs tub comes off in your hand, the landlords don't know how to clean grease off an oven, and apparently cleaning supplies are cheap for some people because they left the whole cabinet below the kitchen sink stocked with 3/4 used bottles of cleaning solution.

When the landlord came over to do the walk through the next day, my mom had encouraged me to ask for a discount on next months rent due to all of the work we have had to do. I asked, and we only got $50 off. Well that's not exactly enough, but it is something. When you spend $156 dollars on cleaning supplies and other fix-it stuff, you kind of want an equal discount. I will pay my mom back later. While the landlord was there, we also pointed out that we didn't know where to go in case of a tornado, we did not have the keys to our mailbox, she does not know how to clean an oven (Landlord "On of the burners on the stove does not work." Mom: "I checked them after I cleaned and they all worked." Landlord: "Oh. I guess that would happen when they are cleaned." Well, DUH!), and she needed to take the paint, bike and two ironing boards with her. Bryan said she looked a little mad that we pointed so many problems out, but we are their first real tenants because the people before us were their friends. I am not their friend so I am going to point out where they need to improve.

Today is the first day that has been a little relaxing despite it being my first day at a new job and Bryan having to do tests at school. We are very thankful for everyone who helped us move and those who sent good thoughts our way while we moved. Fortunately, we will be here for three years before we move again, and hopefully by that time Sonny will have married/same boyfriend/or friends we can use to help us move.

We miss everyone we have left behind, but you can keep up with us in here (if you really want to) or we will see you when we visit (even if you don't want us to).

Until next time...